AJ Lewis Poetry, Poems: Jack (from "A Slip Of The Tongue")

when he was sick
and in the hospital
I had to do his job for him:
janitorial work, not so hard,
just time consuming.

my brother met me at the office building
and we began working.
there were big trash tubs, lots of garbage,
dirty bathrooms and mopping to be done.
and we were doing this because
he doesn't get sick time;
if the job doesn't get done,
then he gets replaced.

when we were done
I went to his car to get a key
but I couldn't find it.
I opened the glove compartment
and a mess of paper fell out.
I fumbled through
and found a letter from his brother
who is in prison, and then another letter
and another.

it was a tomb of memories in his car,
and he carried it all with him.
I found a business plan for his
invention;
he had a patent on it
that almost made him millions
many
many
years
ago.

he was holding onto it like a cross.

he was holding onto it like it could save him.

I looked at it
and began to wonder about myself -
about my ambitions and my dreams.
I wondered about how his nights have been.
have they been dark?
lonely?
sad?
wanting?
I have had these nights.
I have sucked at my bottles and played drunk
in the night.
I have laid numb in bed like
a caged lion.

I carefully put his memories back into his glove compartment.
I wanted to get out of there.
I wanted to drive away
and forget about what I had found.

my brother came out of the building and asked me
what I was doing.

nothing, I said, nothing.