Saturday Afternoon

the shades are drawn shut
on this hot Saturday afternoon.
and I am here
sipping beer (for better or worse),
wondering when this summer will end.

the memories have come to me today
and I have been all around myself:

to San Diego with my brother for a Zwan concert…

walking blind drunk in the afternoon through the reservation…

playing in snow when I was seven…

laying in the pool as a monsoon blows through…
without a job… without a care…

leaving her house that afternoon when I was 16
and the rain was pouring down…

being chased by a pack of dogs in Mexico…

gambling in Las Vegas…

writing under a mesquite tree…

discovering rock music at age 14…

playing in the street at age six at my parent’s first home…
a small house made of red brick…

wandering through caves along the Colorado river…

starting high school… starting college…

missing my grandfather’s last goodbye…

yes, today I have been playing with these thoughts,
and I have been wondering about my story
and about who I am.
if all of me were to be retold
I could only hope for some sort of happy ending.
yet,
I know that all of this will someday end
and the summer season will keep on
with or without
as children smile
and the sun sets and rises again.

waiting and wondering today on this Saturday afternoon…

the summer heat is unbearable.

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