Wanting More

in high school I was very depressed.
I would excuse myself for long bathroom breaks
and go to the top level bridge and
stare at the mountains and the clouds.
I was looking for a release then,
and now,
as I stand at this apartment balcony
looking to the mountains and beyond,
I still
am looking for a release.

there must be more to this life
than just feeling around blindly in the dark.

yet, I stand here now,
wondering and waiting,
as if my entire being is crying out to do something
more than what I have been.
I am hoping for a chance to prove myself
to
myself.

this balcony is like a cage,
and I am a hungry tiger,
holding quiet behind this prison of me,
waiting for the chance to leap out
for the want of more
and more
and more
than this.

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