I needed an outlet to get
the truth of me
out of me
so I purchased a little journal
and filled the pages with my experiences and my
confessions and my
inner thoughts.
it was revealing
too revealing
and it frightened me
how honest and to the point
I had
written.
so I lit three candles and
meditated
to visit the inner parts of me
and I found
hurt
anger
sadness
loss
and I was afraid that if I changed myself
to better myself that I would
lose myself.
becoming a different person
as I saw it
happens this way.
after my meditation
I took the journal outside
and began tearing the pages out
and I threw them into a bucket
and I lit a match
and I watched the flames lick
and lick
and lick
at my words.
when it was over
I realized that all I had written
was for nothing
and that we are all meant for this end.
I stopped writing shortly after that
and it would be years before I would start writing
again.
I think that at some point in our life
we have all reinvented
ourselves.
and what is true
is in us
as we change and
as we grow.
I had to stop writing to find my voice again.
and I had to find a better way
to become the man that
I am
now.
and I wonder sometimes
how many of us have burned a past
to make a
better
future.